Where can we expect to find some of our brightest minds? On college campuses. And it is there that we also find unprecedented numbers of young people battling anxiety.  This correlation makes sense. People who are bright are innately perfectionists and struggle with anxiety. So what do we do to prepare our children for college?  We crank up the pressure without ever teaching them how to cope with it.  The training starts early.  After all, college is what it's all about right?  Elementary school children are hurried from school to a myriad of activities, then back home for a quick bite of dinner so that they can finish their homework and fall exhausted into bed.  Many of our children get very little, if any, time to themselves.  

 

Michelle Rose Gilman, a Head of School in San Diego, posted a blog article titled, In the Name of College! What Are We Doing to Our Children?  In an excerpt from her post, Michelle gives a true life account of a college-bound high school student:  

 

"Kelsey is an 11th grade student at a local private high school in San Diego, California. She is taking a total of six classes of which three are honors classes -- to boost her GPA, and not because she is totally into Chemistry. She volunteers twice per week at a local animal rescue facility - because it will look good on her college application, and not because she really wants to be there. She plays on the girl's golf team, because her private college admissions counselor told her a sport would make her more attractive to her top choice colleges. She takes private SAT prep over the weekends, while the Southern California weather beckons to her like a magnet to a paperclip. Her mom brings her dinner in her bedroom because she sometimes spends up to 6 hours per night doing homework. Kelsey often falls asleep sometime around 1 a.m., with the lights on and with her notebooks scattered around her on the bed. Sometime between 1 a.m. and 6 a.m. her mother tidies things up for her, so that when Kelsey opens her eyes the next morning she is ready to do it all again."  

 

You can check out Michelle's full post at www.huffingtonpost.com/michelle-gilman/in-the-name-of-college-wh_b_6912914.html

 

So what are we doing to our children? 

 

Sending our children to college does not have to ensure a mental health emergency.  Here are 7 tips to stop the insanity and prepare our children for college and life the right way:

 

1.  Provide our children the opportunity for "alone time" without electronics of any kind.  This time is to daydream, think, reflect, create and be comfortable being with themselves.

 

2.  If there is no place for "alone time," then get rid of some things.  Yes, it can be activities!

 

3.  Model the importance of "alone time" by prioritizing it in our own lives.

 

4.  Teach our children how to do things, then let them do them on their own so they can discover their own capability.

 

5.  Teach them grounding practices like taking deep breaths, getting outside, taking a walk, yoga, meditation and mindfulness.

 

6. Help them believe that who they are is wonderful and that they do not need any outside person or institution to verify their worth.

 

7. Keep our own expectations in check.

 

It is up to us to bring balance back into our world.  It has to start somewhere.